When is it ok to be a mummy to all?

Gosh it's an age old question isn't it?

You're friends with someone, really close friends actually.

But when comes the point that it's ok to tell your friend's kids off when they're being naughty?

When is it ok to take those kids only a few feet away to play on a climbing frame with your own children when their mum's got her hands full?

Do you know what? Today I found out there's no formula, it's all down to the individual.

You see, I've made loads of friends at my son's pre school and while we all parent in different ways, there's a kind of an unspoken bond.

Sometimes as a mum, you just instinctively do things to help other mums out, because it's a tough job, let's face it!

Other mums are the only people in the world who know just how much hard work it is to do what we do.

So we all kind of muck in together. Or that's what I've found.

Just the other day, for instance, one of my friends, who is a mum to two boys like me, suggested that she take the two older boys into pre school while I kept an eye on the younger ones.

That worked really well. The older two enjoyed going in together and the younger two didn't feel the need to kick off because they couldn't join in. Great!

But then, at a school fete today, with a friend who was running a stall there, I let her kids step a couple of feet away to play with mine for a minute, thinking she'd appreciate it while she was busy.

You'd think I'd committed mass genocide!

I suppose that because we were so close by and she could see us - and because we were such good friends - I just assumed she be grateful that I was trying to keep them entertained and that she'd appreciate it. But apparently not.

Fact is, you can never second guess people and you can never generalise about the way people think.

They do say the road to hell is paved with good intentions, so maybe I just need to be a bit more selfish in future?

After all we don't live in a commune do we? Why should we look out for each other?

Actually, I think we should. But, I guess that's just what makes me an individual.