Been thinking a lot about honesty and transparency these days. Ever since I became a mum, while being a lot more comfortable talking about things like poo and willies (so much so that my non parent friends cover their eyes and ears), I've also seemed to develop a thicker skin. And I think it might be a mummy thing.
So much stuff goes over your head when you've got ten million things to think of and remember at once. Jokes, insults and blatant truths are nowhere near as shocking or offensive as they used to be and I've found myself so much more adept at laughing stuff off.
I think it's something to do with just not having the time to be bothered. And let's face it, when you've been in labour and given birth in the most undignified way, there's not much after that that's going to floor you either.
One thing I do value these days above anything else isn't hiding your feelings for the sake of politeness, but honesty, openness and transparency. Whether I like what I hear or not, I value the fact that people are honest with me.
You don't like me? Fine, I can handle that! You think something I did was wrong or misguided? Do feel free to tell me, because I value your opinion and truly believe that you have a right to feel the way you do. (Unless you're a 70 something tutting at my child for making the slightest sound, as though all those years back your children really were seen and not heard... Really? Were they? I think you might be going a little senile in your senior years my dear 😁)...
But in all honesty, I prefer people to be real with me, no matter what it is they have to say. Wonderful examples of this are my friends, Michelle, Hayley and Ang. Yeah they can be down right offensive at times, but it's their opinion and honesty that comes with it that I value more than anything. It's also the reason why I love them so much. None of it is malicious and there's no back stabbing, in fact 99% of the time we have a laugh.
These are people who would much rather let you know their thoughts than tell other people in the roundabout hope that it will finally make its way to you and I just wish everyone was like it.
All I'll say is be confident in your opinion and if you can back it up with reasoned and intelligent argument, why feel scared to express it?
Honesty, transparency and openness are my buzzwords for this year as I truly believe that taking away the underhanded nature of backstabbing will help people be happier and more positive all round. Ditch the negative vibes, express your problems, deal with them and move on. Problem solved.